It’s understandable if you considered anal sex as something more in the gray area between adventureous vanilla and kinky until now. You can find anal fetish beginner’s guides in magazine publications that aren’t geared toward the kink community. But anal sex and anal play has so much more to offer to you than just the classic penetrating act. Especially if you consider yourself a kinky person, who enjoys experimenting, then you’ll love what real anal play has to offer to you. Should you have never tried anal sex or anal play because it hasn’t really gripped your attention so far, then you might change your mind.
The kinky inclined, meaning you, shouldn’t have too many issues with finding a person with the same inclination. Specific sites offer kinky alternatives to the usual dating sites and they know that kinksters love soaking up new information, so they throw in a fetish beginner’s guide to various kinks to add to it. Should any of these plays have you salivating for more than just a brief overview, then you know where you can find knowledge and the suiting play partner to experiment with. Here’s what you can try out with them:
When you first start out with anal play, it’s often an experimental and curious finger testing the waters. Depending on how the reaction to that turned out, you either proceeded or stopped altogether. Because this is often done before you really know exactly what to do to make your partner beg for more without cringing in pain, anal play makes most a bit nervous. There’s absolutely no reason to be. It can be intimidating at first, but with the right fetish beginner’s guides and pointers, you’ll be hard-pressed not to incorporate anal play everytime.
Before you start out, you need to know and understand that the anal opening is incredibly sensitive and should be treated accordingly. Any injuries retained in this area are more prone to inflammation and can be incredibly painful. When you want to use your fingers, be sure that your nails are cut short and have no sharp edges with which you can accidentally rip the flesh. The same goes for items. They should be rounded and additionally, if you’re planning on letting them go at some point, should have a narrow ridge and a broad base to keep the toy from accidentally becoming lodged in the rectum; Everyone knows how that famous urban legend ends. In any case, whatever you do when you’re indulging in anal play and sex, always use generous amounts of lubrication. The rectum has no ability to lubricate itself, so anything entering it will feel incredibly painful.
Before the penetration itself you should stretch the opening and help with the relaxation. Whether you’re on the giving or the receiving end, encourage long and deep breaths. A small burning sensation is completely normal, but can be reduced to almost nothing with the right breathing.
The amount of adult toys are endless and so are their possibilities. What really makes them a great addition to your anal play are their different sizes because admittedly, stretching with just your fingers can get exhausting. Not to mention that you’re at least down one hand. Toys also give heterosexual men and lesbian women the chance to have fun with anal play as well. So they’re clearly worth the investment.
Besides just using them during play, you can take an example from what many Doms and Dommes do. For the beginning, you can take your partner out on an alternative kind of date and guide them along to places where they’ll be sitting and standing ever so often with the plug as an honorable third party guest. Obviously, this is something not meant for longer periods of time, but feeling something pleasurable without others knowing what’s going on can be very exciting. Your partner willl never forget it, that’s for sure. Of course, this idea can also be used by you alone or on you.
Another step further is figging. Figging is the act of carving ginger and inserting it. Unlike many toys meant for anal play, it’s not about stretching, but more about the burning feeling the aetheric oils give. Those who practice it say there’s nothing like it, but it’s up to you if you want to try it. Remember to check online what can be used other than ginger for figging though. Some things are doable, but others will just lead to a visit to the ER.
There have been countless others before you who’ve cringed at the thought of a tongue getting even remotely close to an anal opening; hygiene is the main quoted issue, and safer sex is the next. Both issues are important and justified. Those who know their partner and know that they’re healthy can give their anal play a nice foreplay involving cleaning each other, that way you are reassured that they’re clean. If you want to go further, douching can be an additional option. Be careful not to over-do it though, as douching too often can destabilize the natural bacteria in the rectum.
In cases of using protection during sex or if you just can’t get over the hygiene factor and still want to try yourself at anallingus, you can resort to dental dams, plastic wrap or cut open a condom, though the latter should be treated with caution, as many condoms have spermicide coatings that don’t feel so great on your tongue, nor around your anal cavity. Whichever you choose, stretch it carefully over your open mouth and you’re ready to go. With all of these, make sure not to accidentally tear them up with your teeth or by stretching too much.
Expanding Your Play
A step further up on the anal play ladder is stretching. Usually, it’s used in combination with fisting, but in itself it can already give you rewarding results. In theory, you already applied this to a certain extent when you’ve practiced anal play before. As described above in the basics section, stretching is helpful before insertion. The act in itself can be pleasurable and a whole section of anal play in itself though. What you should remember is lubrication and that if you’re planning on having anal sex, you shouldn’t stretch too much beforehand. The anal opening takes a while to readjust and stretching it before anal sex won’t give you the feeling you usually have.
From stretching, the step to fisting or double penetration isn’t that far. For the person on the receiving end, there’s nothing that quite compares to the feeling, and the giver(s) can pretty much say the same. However, these aren’t everyone’s cup of tea and require some practice and experience in the anal play field.
You don’t have to go and try every suggestion in this to see if you like it, of course. But if you’re alternatively trying out kinky dating and they hinted at their liking for anal sex, then you can surprise them with your knowledge from this fetish beginner’s guide and make yourself a memorable date. Learn the strategies for giving a woman an